Cousinade in January in La Teillée, visit to the market in Poitiers, feeding the horses, Queen gives go ahead to new role for Harry and Meghan - no longer to use HRH titles - photos of my Russian roots, home again, Elliot turns 4 months, and other stories.

Sunday 19th January, 2020

With my cousins at the market in Poitiers last Sunday

Good morning all,

Last Sunday saw Suzy and I with our cousins at the market in Poitiers. It was a cold and cloudy day and we had to wrap up well. The idea was to buy some of the Turkish and Arab food sold there for our lunch that day. It was a great food market and I especially liked the stalls selling middle eastern food. We went past a stall selling Arab sweets and cakes which Zuka commented would be lethal for me as I adore baklava. I tried to resist temptation but as both Suzy and Katty loved it too and so of course I bought a big box of various types we would all eat and enjoy over the following days. Not all of them were great though. We only really liked the baklava. Here is Katty at the sweet stall.

Katty at the Arab sweet stall which we found irresistible 

It was a pretty good market as far as markets go. Some of the clothes looked interesting too but it was far too cold to think about trying anything on. It was the Russian stall that intrigued me most. A lovely old Babushka from Moscow was selling home made Russian dishes; the dishes of my childhood. Unfortunately she had run out of pelmeni and borsch but she had some boeuf stroganof which my dear cousin Zuka bought for me. It was funny but I managed to say quite a few things in Russian and Suzy was very surprised to hear me. My mother never taught me to speak her native tongue, wanting my brother and I to feel English, but of course we must have picked up some of the language. I do regret not knowing it, especially when I meet Russians.

At the Russian stall in the market at Poitiers

There were stalls everywhere selling delicious Turkish food, the lachmajun, a sort of wrap stuffed with meat, vegetables or cheese. It was fascinating seeing how the wraps were made and of course I had to have a photo.

Lachmajun in the making

We bought lots of different types we would later have for lunch. We later went for a rather foul coffee which was disappointing especially as I was in France the land of generally good coffee. 

Lunch was good. We liked the Turkish food and of course the sweet stuff. We did not get our walk in that day as it was cold and raining and far too dark by the time we contemplated going out. The afternoon was spent watching The Last Tsars on Netflix. I had seen it already but neither Zuka nor Katty had. Being or Russian origin and of a family who fled the Revolution, the subject was of great interest. Both my grandfather and my Aunty Valya's father had fought in the White Army against the Bolsheviks.  

Soon it was dinner time again and none of us was really hungry but enjoyed Aunty Valya's vegetable soup. Again we all did our own thing later and I went up to my room to watch more of "Spinning" on my iPad. I was soon joined by Suzy and Ruby so had to stop watching. Ruby told us she loved being with her "favourite people". She is such a love. She later wanted to sleep with us but the bed was a bit small for three hahahaha.

Again I slept well and on Monday morning was up at 8. I had more paperwork to do to get my Criminal Records from the UK which I need to apply for Spanish nationality. The paperwork is a bl**** nightmare.

Monday was 13th January and I realised it would have been my great friend Fátima's 59th birthday. Oh how I miss her. I thought about her a lot that day as I do often. She is forever in my heart. This photo surfaced on Facebook reminding me of our wonderful friendship. I only wish she was still here.

Fátima would have turned 59 on Monday. Oh how I miss her!

We spent most of the day at home that day only venturing out in the afternoon for a cold walk. I took the time to sort out my paperwork to be sent to Pilar, my accountant. I had to send her all the receipts and invoices for the last quarter of 2019. It's quite a job but I was happy when it was finished. I also updated my Airbnb documents and sent off the latest calendar to Eladio as I was away for the arrival of new guests this week. This week we had a lady called Cecilia from Peru, on Thursday Ingrid, from Colombia, would be arriving. On Thursday too, Sonia, the Portuguese girl who lives in France, would be returning. Thus we had full house this week which is great for January; usually a quiet month.

We played a card game called "scum" which I lost miserably and then went for our walk. We took with us carrots, old apples and some sugar cubes to feed the lovely horses. Some of them were clad in blankets and we were all wearing various layers of clothing as it was bitterly cold outside. At least, though, the sun was shining. Here is a little selfie of our group on the walk that day.

A selfie on our walk on Monday

Katty took most of the photos and I love this one of Suzy, Ruby and I from the back with little Ruby in the middle. She says we are her favourite people. Well she is one of mine I can tell you. What a lovely little girl she is.

Suzy and I on the walk with Ruby in the middle

With Suzy and little Ruby

We had fun feeding the horses who came willingly to the fence when we called them. They did love the food we gave them, especially the apples. Here is Ruby with one of them.

Ruby with one of the horses

A cup of tea was in order when we got back after our cold walk. Soon afterwards we were drinking wine. Actually it was my 94 year old great aunt and my cousins Zuka and Katty who were. I deferred as I get headaches but gave in after a while and had two glasses that evening. I only got a small headache so it was worth it.

I was in charge of dinner that night. Suzy and I had planned to make a Spanish dinner consisting of tortilla, steamed asparagus, roast red peppers and a tomato salad. We had brought all the ingredients with us hahaha, yes that great big load of fruit and veg we brought from Spain. I didn't have Eladio with me to turn the omelets but somehow managed myself. The table looked like this just before we sat down.

A Spanish dinner for our cousins

While in La Teillée I didn't really follow the news as much as I do at home. The big news that day came from Buckingham Palace. In talks between the senior royals and Harry and Meghan, the Queen gave her go ahead for their transition role. I suppose she didn't have much option if they insist on stepping back as senior royals and dividing their time between Canada and London.

The Queen gave her go ahead this week to a new role for Harry and Meghan

This was the wording of the statement the palace issued.

Today my family had very constructive discussions on the future of my grandson and his family.

My family and I are entirely supportive of Harry and Meghan's desire to create a new life as a young family. Although we would have preferred them to remain full-time working members of the Royal Family, we respect and understand their wish to live a more independent life as a family while remaining a valued part of my family.

Harry and Meghan have made clear that they do not want to be reliant on public funds in their new lives.

It has therefore been agreed that there will be a period of transition in which the Sussexes will spend time in Canada and the UK.

These are complex matters for my family to resolve, and there is some more work to be done, but I have asked for final decisions to be reached in the coming days.

How this would work out in practice was anyone's guess. I have to say the Queen though has been very understanding.  The Queen issued another statement on Saturday formalising the split of the couple - now called "Megxit" - whereby we learned they would no longer be able to use their HRH titles. I do wonder what Harry's dear mother, Lady Diana, would have thought; after all she lost her HRH title too.  But more about the statement below. 

After our Spanish dinner we all retired to Zuka's great big lounge with huge comfortable settees and arm chairs which are a bit like those found in first class airlines. It was difficult to find something to watch to suit all our tastes because of our age difference; for the record, 11, 18, 35, 62, 72 and 94! In the end we chose Mr. Bean's Holiday (Les vacances de Mr. Bean). I had never seen it and found it absolutely hilarious but then again I really love Rowan Atkinson.

It was late to bed again, at around 1 in the morning and miracle of miracles I woke up at 8.30 on Tuesday morning. It was a wet and cold day and no weather for our walk. The highlight of the day was taking Ruby to practice her gymnastics at a gym in Lusignan, about 15km from La Teilée.  Suzy and I took her while Zuka was out with Katty and Luc on errands and later with her mother. Ruby is a proper pro and all the little girls at the gym kept staring at her. My French let me down when the monitor asked me if she wanted to use the "poutre". I understood the horse because poutre sounds similar to the word "potro" in Spanish meaning a horse. However, she meant a "beam" which Ruby did need to use and I said no. Now I have learned the word for beam in French forever. She had to practice on the floor rather than on the mattresses as a lesson was going on. I loved watching her. Here she is doing one of her numbers.

Ruby the gymnast

While I was at the gym with Ruby, Oli, Miguel and Elliot were on their way to our house in Madrid. I'm sure Eladio was in need of their company. Someone asked me whether I was having grandson withdrawal symptoms. Well, I certainly was missing him when I was away. I asked for a picture and got a lousy selfie so will post instead a lovely photo of Eladio and Elliot the next morning.

Eladio and Elliot on Wednesday morning

Elliot turned 4 months on Friday but looks so much bigger as you all know.

We came home to have a cup of tea and then when Zuka and my Aunty Valya returned it was "aperitif time" and we all had a drink. I was dreading a headache but only got a small one. I love aperitif time with my 94 year old aunt and talking to her about the past, my mother's family past. I shall be back in the spring to tape her for my mother's book. She has so much information in her head and in documents and photos and she will be my main source of research for the book. I just have to get down to it.

I made everyone my vegetable soup for dinner which was followed by lovely ice cream Ruby, Suzy and I had got at the "Intermarché" supermarket in Lusignan. All in all it was a happy family dinner.

Wednesday came and again miraculously I was awake at 8.30 in the morning and was the first one up.  Soon everyone was up and there was a buzz going in the kitchen. Oh how I love being with my cousins, the only real family I have on my mother's side and oh how I wished she could be with us. That morning Katty was not feeling well. She had an upset stomach and was worried about travelling back to New Zealand on Friday and feeling ill. Her mother Zuka took her to the hospital in Poitiers, a 45 minute drive away, and they would be there till the late afternoon. Unfortunately there was  a doctor's strike on so she never got a scan, just a blood test and was sent home with paracetamol! Not good I have to say. I was left to make everyone's lunch and I rustled up a meal I hoped everyone would like. While I was cooking an English couple came round to bring some scones and jam for Zuka. Babs and Paul are a retired English couple who gave up everything in the UK to come and live in France. Like me, they are worried about the consequences of Brexit. When they left  I took little Ruby once again to Lusignan for more gym practice. This time I knew how to say that she needed the beam hahahaha. And here she is on it. All the little girls there practicing looked on with awe.

Ruby on the beam

I left her for a while to go and fill the tank for our journey back. It annoyed me that petrol is so much more expensive in France than in Spain. Everything was automatic and I was confronted with a funny system, unknown to me, but I managed to understand it all in French of course.

An hour or so later I was home and we all had lunch without Zuka and Katty who were at the hospital. Then we all had a siesta except for Ruby. She came to wake me up at one stage by jumping on top of me hahahaha,

Later in the evening Suzy, Katty and I were gathered by my Aunty Valya who is 94 and was the wife of my mother's youngest brother Nicolai. She wanted to show us some old photos of the family as well as documents. I will be coming later in the year to interview her when I will get lots more information but the session that day was very informative. I have lots of repeat photos at home but some of hers were new and very revealing. There is one particular photo taken in Bulgaria in about 1933 or 1934 with all the family and some other people. The only sibling missing is my mother's youngest sister, Masha. But the others are all there; from age down; Sasha, Olga, Dara, my mother Elena and Nicolai. Both her parents are there too, Dedushka (grandfather) Andrei Lieven and Babushka (grandmother née Sophie Stachovich). My grandfather who was over 2 metres tall is the man with the beard in the middle. He became a Russian orthodox priest and both my Aunts Olga and Dara became nuns. Religion was all important to the family. It's funny to see my mother (far left) as a young girl. I reckon she is about 13, 14 or 15 in the photo.

A unique photo of my mother and family my Aunty Valya had. It's of them in Bulgaria in about 1933 to 1935. Botton row left to right, my mother, an unknown woman, my grandfather, my grandmother and  their youngest son Nicolai. Top row left to right,  oldest son Sasha, oldest daughter Olga, unknown man, unknown woman and Dara, middle daughter. 

Suzy, Katty and I were bowled over by the photo, one none of us had ever seen. There were many others I took photos of which I shall use in my mother's book. One struck me as very interesting. It was of my mother's immediate older sister Dara who later became a nun. Just before WW2 she was sent to London to train to become a nun at St. Thomas' hospital. She spent the war in London and in the photo the nurses are carrying helmets. Later I heard from my Aunt that after the war she joined my mother and Nicolai in Austria where she also helped displaced people. When the war ended she left for Montreal with her older brother Sasha and finally settled in New York as a nun. 

The other photo I loved and didn't have at home is one of my two sets of grandparents and great grandparents on the day of my grandparents' wedding. It was in 1910 in Moscow. My grandfather, Prince Andrei Lieven (1884-1949), his Serene Highness, married my grandmother, Sophie Alexandrovna Stachovich(1886-1961). In the front my grandmother and her mother my great grandmother Olga Ivanova nee Ribeaupierre (1862-1936)  In the back my grandfather who was over 2 metres tall with his mother, my great grandmother Alexandra Petrovna Vasilchikova (1861-1929). What a photo, the only one that exists today of my mother's parents and their parents together. They went from riches to rags because of the Russian revolution. Thank you Auntie Valya for this photo I shall now treasure and include in my mother's book.

My grandparents and their parents on the day of their wedding in Moscow in about 1910. 

There was so much to take in but not enough for my book so for sure I shall be back to see my Aunt later this year. I shall be taping her as she is a living memory of my mother's past and the Lieven and Stachovich family.

My mind was overworked by then but it was time for dinner, our last with the family in La Teillée. I went to bed relatively early on our last night and was up at 7.30 on Thursday, our last morning there. The first thing I did after my coffee was upload more documents onto the CRB platform to obtain my criminal records which will then need legalising with the "apostille of the Hague". This is just the beginning of the daunting paperwork towards Spanish citizenship. Oh how I hate paperwork.  When it was over I did my packing and then went for a walk with Katty in the sunshine. Like all places, La Teillée is much nicer in the sun. Soon it was time for lunch and our departure was looming. We said our goodbyes and just before we set off we had to have a selfie of all of us with my Aunty Valya as I didn't have one of her on this visit. Here we are the Kiwi/Madrid/La Teillée family. How I wish we all lived nearer.

A selfie of the 7 of us which we took just before leaving.

We left at 3.15 pm or so and our cousins gave us the most wonderful send off. Luc stood at the gate, Katty stood out in the street and a bit further down Ruby stood in the middle not letting us leave. 

Katty waving as we left

Ruby on the road not letting us leave

We left with a heavy heart and had a daunting 900km to drive home. It would take us just under 10 hours. Again we stopped every two hours to get petrol or water or just stretch our legs. Suzy sang most of the way giving me a wonderful private concert. The journey seemed endless. It took about 4.5 hours to the Spanish border and another 4.5 hours home, not including the stops. We were in touch with our cousins in La Teillée and with Eladio and Oli letting them know how our journey was going. We finally reached home at about quarter of an hour after midnight. The house was dark and silent although it was full of guests. We greeted the dogs in the kitchen, put stuff away and went upstairs to unpack and go to sleep. Eladio woke up for a while and we spoke until about 1 in the morning.

Miraculously I was up at 8.30 on Friday morning.  I had breakfast late and at about 9 am was reunited with little Elliot who turned 4 months old that day. It was wonderful to hold him in my arms again and to lie him down and communicate. He does so by smiling and making cooing noises. He most obviously recognised me. I took him to see Suzy who was still asleep. What better way to wake her up than to take her her little nephew? She was delighted to see him and he was delighted to see her. Here they are together.

Elliot and Suzy reunited. They were both delighted to see each other again

I then went to see my father to give him his Bonne Maman jam and biscuits and to greet him after a week's absence. He too was delighted to see me  and so was I. I showed him the photos Aunty Valya had showed us and he was happy to see his wife, my mother, as a young girl and all the rest of the photos. 

My holiday was over and I had lots to do that morning; more paperwork for obtaining Spanish nationality and of course preparing the lunch and going shopping. The cupboards were bare, especially of fruit and veg. 

By 2.15 we were all sitting down at the table for a reunion family lunch. It's always lovely to be together and I treasure each time we are. Later we watched the news and had quite a long siesta. Then it was time for our walk. The girls and Elliot came too and we all enjoyed the afternoon sunshine. Unbelievably it was still light as we were returning at 6.45. It was a lot warmer than in France too.  

It was when we got back that  I met our Colombian guest, Ingrid, a teacher of physiotherapy who has for booked 9 nights and Sonia, the Portuguese girl who lives and works in France and is also a physiotherapist. Later we would all coincide in our big kitchen where Andy, our Scottish guest whose home is in France, was making his dinner. It felt like the United Nations. At just after 8 pm, Miguel arrived from Valencia bringing a great big crate of freshly picked oranges which were and are delicious. They are just as we like them, fresh from the tree, but not covered in wax, something I do not like. This was the crate.

Oranges from Valencia, freshly picked from the trees on Friday morning

We all went to bed early and I fell asleep watching a film called Zodiac. 

On Saturday morning I was up at 07.30, again not bad I think.  Saturday was mostly a family day with the girls, Miguel and Elliot with us until after lunch. They then went back to Oli and Miguel's flat to spend the rest of the day and evening. They would have guests for dinner. We spent our day quietly with not much sign of our own guests. The weather was vile - we are facing a storm called Gloria - so we never ventured out.

The big news that day came from Buckingham Palace. After the statement earlier in the week, the Queen issued another one which came as a new bombshell. The Sussexes will no longer be allowed to use their HRH titles when performing duties, nor represent the crown. That doesn't mean though that they have lost the titles. Here is the full statement below. Actually there is one from the Queen and one from Buckingham Palace.

Statement from The Queen: 

Following many months of conversations and more recent discussions, I am pleased that together we have found a constructive and supportive way forward for my grandson and his family.

Harry, Meghan and Archie will always be much loved members of my family.

I recognise the challenges they have experienced as a result of intense scrutiny over the last two years and support their wish for a more independent life.

I want to thank them for all their dedicated work across this country, the Commonwealth and beyond, and am particularly proud of how Meghan has so quickly become one of the family. 

It is my whole family’s hope that today’s agreement allows them to start building a happy and peaceful new life.

Statement from Buckingham Palace: 

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex are grateful to Her Majesty and the Royal Family for their ongoing support as they embark on the next chapter of their lives.

As agreed in this new arrangement, they understand that they are required to step back from Royal duties, including official military appointments. They will no longer receive public funds for Royal duties.  

With The Queen’s blessing, the Sussexes will continue to maintain their private patronages and associations. While they can no longer formally represent The Queen,  the Sussexes have made clear that everything they do will continue to uphold the values of Her Majesty.

The Sussexes will not use their HRH titles as they are no longer working members of the Royal Family.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have shared their wish to repay Sovereign Grant expenditure for the refurbishment of Frogmore Cottage, which will remain their UK family home. Buckingham Palace does not comment on the details of security arrangements. There are well established independent processes to determine the need for publicly-funded security.

This new model will take effect in the Spring of 2020.

Wow! What a move and change in the lives of now plain Harry and Meghan or should I say the Duke and Duchess of Sussex? I'm not sure whether they wanted to retain the titles. After all their new website is called "Sussex Royal" and this may mean they have to ditch the term "royal". But as someone commented on internet, "they can't have their cake and eat it". 

Harry and Meghan will no longer represent The Queen. 

Many journalists and other people vented anger after the announcement. Piers Morgan from ITV's "Good Morning Britain" went as far as to say he was surprised it had taken Meghan so long to "ditch his family" and his country after their decision to spend a lot of time in Canada. Well, what can I say? I actually agree you  can't have your cake and eat it. If they don't want the hassle of being royal, then I don't disagree to them stepping down. For me, this is a nail in the coffin of the royal family which in these modern days seems to me a bit archaic. At the same time it slightly saddens me as deep down, however progressive and modern I am, I was brought up on the Royal family in England as a child and can't help but love the Queen. No doubt, she is very sad about her grandson's decision. Was it all Meghan's doing I wonder? Probably not. A lot of it has to do with how badly treated she was by the British press, mainly the tabloids. But I'm afraid you can't be royal and expect not to be  news for the public. It's funny but this whole story of "Megxit" has garnered them even more bad press than before their decision to step down. I also know for sure that even as former royals, they will still be submitted to the same media interest as before. The story continues and will do for many years just as the abdication of Edward VIII, the Queen's Uncle, still does today. It's funny but both scandals were caused by American women who I suppose do not revere the British royal family as many  of us who  were born in the UK do. 

Today is Sunday and storm Gloria has not made its appearance here yet. I think the south east is going to be the worst hit. I hope the weather is good enough for our walk. The day promises to be quiet and relaxed, something I need after our trip to France and the exhausting drive back. 

So, my friends, I shall leave you now to get on with the day. Cheers till next week, Masha.